When can a short, reassuring, phrase bring conversation to a halt? When it is uttered by a doctor. In an interesting study of doctor-patient communication, the phrase, "I'm really pleased (or happy) with your progress," tends to end any questioning or the raising of any further concerns by a patient. The doctor is the authority, she is happy, so everything must be okay. The doctor, in her defense, usually means this as a comforting phrase, a reassurance, but does not realize how it shuts down any concerns that the patient might have.
Are there other such "show stoppers" in conversations? The obvious "whatever" certainly indicates an end of interest, but that is its intention. What about unintentional comments or phrases that make others think you are no longer interested, even if you are? Maybe something like, "I hope that goes well for you," fills the bill. I know I sometimes say this, not intending for it to be the last word. But, it certainly could be interpreted that way.
1 comment:
I think "Let me know if you need anything" and "Let me know if I can do anything for you" would fit into that category.
Those comments mean, "I'm sorry you're having a tough time or that your life has fallen apart, but I'm not committing to actually doing anything for you because I've got to get back to my own life now, so see ya' later, okay?"
Wow... all that just came tumbling out through my fingers... hmmm... I guess I must feel pretty strongly about those phrases being show stoppers.
Post a Comment