Houses=Identity

What do our houses tell about us? I guess I haven't thought about it too much until the other day when I was talking to a professor who is relocating to the Syracuse area. As we were talking it was clear that choosing a house can tell a lot about a person. How concerned are they about the schools, and what are they looking for in schools? Some people want the highest quality education (measured by average SAT scores, number of AP courses, high state test scores). Others feel that those type of suburban schools are too rigid and competitive, and want a smaller, more intimate setting where kids of all types can excel. Some people want a house that won't require much upkeep, something new and easy to care for. Others want something unique and unusual. Some want contemporary, some traditional. Some want to be close to work, others don't mind a commute. Some want to be able to walk to stores, others want wide open spaces. What do all of those characteristics tell us about a person? How does searching for a house make us examine our values and identity?

Thinking like a girl

I had someone accuse me the other day of "thinking like a girl." I admit I throw like a girl, but think like a girl? I'm not sure what that means. What she meant was that I wasn't thinking big enough or confidently enough, I wasn't being bold. Is that how girls think? Small and quiet? Maybe. But I guess it is situationally dependent. In some circumstances I have seen girls, and women, think quite big, take on jobs that any boy would imagine daunting.

I think "thinking like a girl" in this case was very career specific. Girls maybe are not ambitious enough, too willing to do the grunt work, rather than the glory work. Sometimes I think the grunt work is more rewarding. It can be closer to the people (think of doctor versus nurse), it can be more immediately satisfying. Does the lack of glory make the work worth less? Of course not, we have all had enough feminist training to understand the value of "invisible work," or the ways in which "women's work" has been marginalized. But is the answer to "think like a boy?" Or is it to take "glory jobs" and still think like a girl.....

A book I want to read

Last night I heard the re-run of Fresh Air on NPR (our local station replays the program at midnight.) Terry Gross was interviewing Michelle Goldberg about a new book she authored titled, The Means of Reproduction: Sex, Power, and the Future of the World . I didn't hear all of the interview, but thought it might be a good supplement for my population class. It sounds like it has some historical information on the spread of contraceptive use and some of the political arguments around its use and non-use. For instance, before China adopted the famous "one child policy" it actually was encouraging large families, with the belief that strength comes in numbers. Of course, if you can't feed all of those numbers you have a problem. Anyway, I checked it out on Amazon and will probably order it. We'll see if it turns up on the spring syllabus.

Spring?

Spring is my least favorite season. Too unpredictable. I do like the light feeling of shedding winter coats. But the temperatures fluctuate so much, the sun is fickle, and there is mud. In winter it is cold, gray and snowy. If a sunny day comes along we can enjoy it as a welcome break in the monotony, but we don't expect it to stay sunny. In the fall, there is a crispness in the air that is welcome after the heat of summer. In summer it is hot, too hot usually for my tastes, but I live far enough north that I don't worry about that too much. But spring? You do have the flowers blooming and trees budding...sometime that will happen here. But, overall, I could do without this season.

Two sociological items

In the last couple of weeks I've seen or heard two things that I would like to use as examples in my introductory sociology course. The first is the movie Frozen River. It is great examples of culture, immigration, poverty, and family. The story involves a mother, who desparate for money, transports illegal immigrants across the Canadian-Upstate NY border. Since the border runs through Mohawk territory, there is some question about the legality of the action. In the course of the action, she befriends a young Mohawk woman trying to regain custody of her son. The story of their relationship to each other, to their children and family, and to the "authorities" in their culture all highlight the interdependence of individuals.

Today, I heard an excellent segment on language on Morning Edition. Here is the link

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=102518565&sc=emaf

The story, titled, Shakespeare Had Roses All Wrong, discusses the meanings attached to words. Krulwich, who is a great science reporter (check out Radio Lab), describes research on the meanings attached to a word like "bridge" by speakers of different languages. In some languages the word is considered "feminine," in others it is considered "masculine." Speakers of those languages used different adjectives to describe a generic bridge. In the "feminine" languages, they used words like "delicate" or "graceful." In the "masculine" languages, they used words like "sturdy" or "strong." It is an interesting description of the ways in which language influences us.

Learning to be Diplomatic

My younger son is learning how to be diplomatic. We went for a haircut today and his barber is a mom (is there a term for a woman barber?) who has a son the same age and in the same school. As she was cutting his hair she started to ask about some of the other boys in that grade, one kid in particular. She wondered what he was like in school, who he hung out with, etc. Evan seemed to answer pretty honestly, although he struggled for some words. For instance, he said, "Well he doesn't seem to try that hard at his schoolwork" (meaning goofs off). Or, "I think the best word to describe his is 'distant'." (meaning has few friends).

Turns out the barber's son and this boy had become friends, but since then her son's grades had dropped. She wondered if he was a "bad influence." She went on to ask about her son, how he got along with others at school, did he have friends, and so on. I could tell Evan was trying to be nice, but honest, at the same time.

On the drive home, he said, "that was kind of an uncomfortable conversation!" I agreed that it was a little difficult, but that often parents want to hear from other kids about what goes on at school. He asked if I thought he had handled it well, I told him I did. He commented, "I was trying to be nice to both Mrs. J and to J." He thought for awhile, and then said, "I wouldn't really say it was fun, but it did make me think a lot. It was kind of tricky to know what to say and I had to concentrate. It was sort of a challenge." I would have to say that he handled it all pretty well, and is well on his way to being a diplomat, especially if he thinks that kind of thinking is fun.